The Death of Silence?

‘Silence is one of the great victims of modern culture…’

– John O’ Donohue

I am sitting in a coffee shop trying to gather my thoughts about this post. The importance of silence is my intended topic. All around me is noise; music is pounding from the speakers set up in the high corners of the cafe, customers queuing beside me place their orders, the cappuccino machine hisses, a toddler is whining at the next table and a truck rumbles by on the road outside.

I resume my scribbling and finish a few more lines.

Now the barista is banging the espresso holder against a wooden block in an attempt to dislodge the used coffee grounds.

Whack, whack, whack. 

It is a good thing that I can block out most sounds.

but….

…then there are the days when I am tired, irritable, in need of a break from my kids, and the constant driving, moving, talking, making, getting, that being a mom of young children involves ……you get the drift,

…and on those days when my resistance is low, I am powerless to block out noise, in fact on those days it seems amplified,

but luckily I have a secret weapon!

My back yard.

In summer when I step out onto the back deck, I am greeted by the cawing of crows who from sunrise to sunset feast and fight in our towering cherry tree. The sun feels good on my face and there is usually a slight breeze off the ocean. As I sit on the patio I can pick up the scent of the tomato plants, the lavender, the roses. My eyes settle on the soft shapes of the greenery, the tree branches bending in the wind.

Gratitude is what comes to mind when I step out into my back yard. I am grateful for the birds and nature, grateful I live in a  quiet neighbourhood, grateful that there is enough space for me to plant a small vegetable garden, grateful for the flowers and berries, grateful that the ocean is near and because of this the air always seems impossibly fresh and the sky bluer.

My kitchen may be dated, I may have a blue toilet and matching sink in the powder room (truth!), and the wallpaper in my living room may remind you of your grandmother’s house, but on most days I don’t care;

for I have my backyard. 

If the kids are at school or out and I am feeling edgy and anxious, I will make a point of planting myself in the backyard, maybe under one of the trees near the bird feeder and I sit, being still and silent for a minimum of ten minutes. During this time there is no drinking tea, no flipping through the paper , no sending text messages-nothing.

What usually happens is that the ten minutes fly by and I find myself wanting this silence and stillness to continue, so if I can I stay put.

But generally life intervenes, the kids need picking up, or I need to make a call, or an errand needs to be run, or dinner needs to be made and my peaceful back yard time comes to an end.

After I have given myself this gift of quiet time I notice that I am calmer, the brain fog is gone and I have clarity of thought, and because I am calm and clear I am better able to handle whatever the rest of the day throws at me.

That is what stillness and silence and nature does for me.

John O’Donohue was an Irish poet, author, philosopher, and at one time a priest, and he is best known for popularizing Celtic spirituality. I first heard him speak on the CBC radio program ‘Tapestry’ . What a voice! A lilting, Irish whiskey of a voice, and like most Irish he was full of humour, a fabulous story teller and had a wonderful way of delivering his wise poems.

In his book Anam Cara a Book of Celtic Wisdom, he talks about how silence is a great friend of the soul. How it is a teacher and will help you to find the treasures within. He explains that so many people miss out on these insights because they are too restless, too busy, too over scheduled, with minds that are always elsewhere, that they are haunted by their pasts, their regrets, or worried about their futures.

He puts it this way;

‘Peoples lives are being dragged outward all the time. The inner world of the soul is suffering a great eviction by the landlord forces of advertising and external social reality. One of the reasons so many people are suffering from stress is not that they are doing stressful things but that they allow so little time for silence.’

He speaks about how people use their life energy to focus on ‘the shadow lands’, TV screens, video games, social media sites etc…

‘…silence is one of the great victims of modern culture. We live in an intense and visually aggressive age; everything is drawn outward toward the sensation of image…the surfaces of our minds continue to be seduced by the power of images.’

So try this;

the next time you find yourself feeling stressed, worried, ruminating on the past or future, or unsure about a decision you need to make,

Ask yourself whether silence, solitude and space, may be what you need, and if so, take yourself out into the quiet of nature, be it your backyard or a local park, or just the stillness of your room, and be still for as long as you can.

Take it from a wise man like John O’Donohue;

nothing can bring you peace but yourself.

Take care,

and thanks for allowing me space in your in-box!

Elizabeth

www.fullflightlifecoaching.com

Full Flight Life Coaching 2014